Thank you, Yesterday

One of the biggest things that hold us back from achieving our fullest potential is the lingering narratives from our past. The moments of success and joyful memories keep us going, but the weight of mistakes, shame, guilt, and regrets can be crippling. Holding on to the past hinders you from realizing your authentic self. In this post, we are going to take a few moments to reflect on our past—with all its ups and downs—take lessons from the past and stop to say “thank you, yesterday.”

The pressure of the past

In the last post, I wrote about the importance of addressing our negative self-talk and shared a few ways to begin that practice. Most of our negative self-talk stems from past experiences and present fears. I would argue that there is not a person on this planet that doesn’t wish to become the best version of themselves. No one just wakes up and decides to self-destruct, self-sabotage, or stop trying.

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The Importance of Changing Your Negative Self-Talk

Words have power. Therefore, it’s crucial to keep working on changing your negative self-talk.

Growing up you might have heard the expression, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Well, I’m here to tell you that’s a lie. The sooner we accept this is the sooner we can start to acknowledge the impact words have had on us throughout our lives and start healing and changing the way we speak to ourselves.

For the sake of this post, let’s think about words like seeds that we plant into our lives. The seeds we water will grow, and those that we don’t water will die. It’s simple as that. If we feed the negative self-talk, it will grow. If we feed the positive that will grow.

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10 Signs It’s Time to Hit The Reset Button

Life is a marathon, a journey that will inevitably bring many ups and downs. And, if you’ve been on this journey for any amount of time, you know that there are times when you just need to hit the reset button so that you can keep moving forward with strength, focus, stamina, and even passion in your life. 

For a long time, the thought of voluntarily hitting the reset button in my life was a little terrifying to embrace. Any time I had heard someone talk about needing a reset in their life, it was connected to something negative—a failure, burnout, a breakup or divorce, or related to a physical or mental health concern.

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20 Places to Get Free Birthday Treats

If there was ever a good time to treat yourself, your birthday would be that day! Well, as a little happy birthday from me to you, I’ve compile a list of 20 free birthday treats you can collect on that big day!

Birthday pastries on a table

Some people say “the best things in life are free.” Other people say “nothing in life is free.”

Maybe it is possible that both carry truth and are worthy of intellectual pursuit, but we will save that for another day because today is either your birthday, it’s coming up very soon, or you are planning ahead (good for you). In either case, happy birthday to you!

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Run At Your Own Pace

#dearself is a series of blog posts written to my past, present, or future self. I hope you can find a lesson or gentle reminder in this personal note that you can apply to your life as well.

Dear Self,

When will you really start listening to me? You have more inside of you than you ever acknowledge or embrace! I hope today showed you a valuable life lesson—focus more on running YOUR best race at your own pace.

Yes, you used to be able to run four to five miles everyday, but that was 10 years ago when you were in competition shape. Girl, you are older and things change. (Ladies and gentleman, it is true. Two miles is now a STRUGGLE for me. These knees and lower back are showing signs of old age and the lack of stretching enough).

When you first set out in your mind to run three miles without stopping today, I said “it’s about time that you get back at it.” But, I was nervous for you because this is not the first time you made this goal in the last year. You’ve started before with a image of ten years ago in your mind. Then, the burn in those legs started about 0.5 miles in and you listened to those voices of doubt telling you to just walk for a few seconds before getting back at it.

But, there was something different about today.

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Happiness is a Choice Not a Chase 

Epiphany: Happiness is a choice.

#dearself is a series of blog posts written to my past, present, or future self. I hope you can find a lesson or gentle reminder in this personal note that you can apply to your life as well.

Dear Self,

Are you happy? You have asked yourself this question so many times throughout your life. Whenever people asked you where you envisioned your life in the future, your answer always included that you wanted “to be happy.” If someone asked you right now where you want to be five, ten, or twenty years from now, “being happy” would definitely make the list. Sure, it’s a common goal. Then again, who would not want to be happy in this life?

I am OK with you leaving happiness on your list of goals as long as you promise me to remember one important thing—happiness is a choice, not a chase. 

There were so many times when you didn’t feel happy. It was sad for me to watch you become increasingly frustrated with not “feeling” happy because happiness is just that—a feeling.

The “feeling” came and went and the other feeling called blah came and went too. I cannot even tell you how many hours, days, weeks, and even months you spent trying to figure out what would make you happy. At times you looked like a deflated happy birthday balloon struggling to hold on to helium. You smiled and wished that people could not detect how frustrated or unhappy you were, but I know you and I knew better.

Yet, look at you now. Time taught you what I and life were trying to teach you all along—happiness is a choice, not a chase. You were quite hardheaded at times, but you slowly started to learn that you can bring happiness into your life instead of waiting for it to come knocking on your door.

Please do me a favor… 

Do not go back to being a hoarder of stress. I am going to need you to eliminate the joy killers in your life one by one.  Do not think for one second that you are going to just coast through life and stumble upon happiness. You are going to need to work on this thing!

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5 Steps to Start Finding Inner Peace

If you haven’t started yet, I’m here to let you know that it’s time to start finding inner peace.

Once upon a time, two people—your parents—decided to have a baby. You had no choice in the matter and your personal life journey began without the perfect manual. If you’re human, then there are days when you might feel knocked off course and just plain uneasy because [insert any of the many triggers here]. In those times, what steps can you take to start finding inner peace?

Frankly, there are so many pressures, stressors, choices, and unknowns that scare (and scar) us in ways that prevent us from living a prosperous, happy, and purposeful life. Our goal is to counteract those by channeling our inner peace—a place of physical, emotional, and spiritual stability in the face of challenge.

Let me just say this: If you don’t feel you are in a place of inner peace right now, it’s not because it’s not possible for you. It’s likely that you just need to be more deliberate and intentional about seeking out strategies and ways to create emotional and spiritual peace. Life is filled with ups and downs, peaks and valleys, highs and lows, and lots of tears and laughter. The good news: With intentional work, you can begin strengthening your capacity to channel your inner peace. 

One thing is certain: The journey to self-discovery, success, and personal empowerment requires the possession and sustainability of a strong sense of inner peace. But how can we begin that journey?

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Focus on Productivity, Not Perfection

Have you ever wondered how someone with more responsibilities or demands is able to achieve more than you? No, they are not perfect, alien, or some breed of human meets robot. They are not special. It’s possible that they have just learned how to focus on productivity and efficiency.

Let’s get one thing clear before we move any further: A happy life does not mean a “perfect” life. So, be careful not to strive for a one-sided picture of someone else’s life as your measure of success.

Merriam-Webster and Oxford dictionaries define perfection as:

  • “having no mistakes or flaws”
  • “completely correct or accurate”
  • “having all the qualities you want in that kind of person, situation, etc.”
  • “having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be”
  • “free from any flaw or defect in condition or quality; faultless”

I don’t know about you, but I’ve never seen anyone that’s flawless and perfect. If this is how you are defining our success, then you are already headed down the wrong path.

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